Breeding concerns forum, "interviews".... - Page 2

flyndog · 07-12-2005, 04:35 PM

Well, I can't make "policy", but I can set the tone for guidelines. Those of us here now who are interested can feel free to step in anytime we think another member is being attacked or unjustly flamed by the "Inquisitors" and try to gently and tactfully difuse it.

Let me set my official Super Moderator seal to this. Stamp "So it is said, so it shall be done."

D.Schäferhund · 07-12-2005, 05:44 PM

hi
That is what i had in mind, I was thinking the people come here to get advice, and discuss. i guess most of us people here have a good knowledge and opinions that are nice to share, you never know everything, and it is nice to get other peoples opinions.
When i look at me i am a worrier personality, i take a lot of research and still like other peoples opinions. i like it when I get other ways of seeing things to question my own opinions.
so the people come here for help for beeing educated...
so i believe they have atleast the good will to learn something and to do the best they can to improve...
so i rather help them with the topic and then if i suspect something I would ask more questions...
but I recently read a post where a person felt urged to lay out all the privat infomation about income to 'defend'(?) himself. i think that's not needed.

On the other side purebred, purebred what is purebred today???
most newer Breeds are "mutts", most of the breeds came up in the last 50years out of allready existing purebreds...
i had to think of that when I read Labradoodle again...
who says when you can make mixed breeds???
Oh ok thats a different topic, sorry got out of my way...

so back to subject...
I hope it gets more to the point of helping people then giving them the third degree....

***Cassiepeia*** · 07-12-2005, 06:47 PM

Thanks Kit.

D.Schäferhund - I agreed with you all the way up until the 'mutt'/purbreed issue. LOL I'll never play nice with someone who's pro breeding more and more and more mutts. We have enough already, too many dogs (both mutt and "pure" breed) being over bred and put to sleep for me to be nice about that.
But you're right, that's another subject entirely.

Cass.

D.Schäferhund · 07-12-2005, 06:53 PM

Yes I know it is a very complicated subject, it just struck my mind in that context......

momtobella · 07-12-2005, 09:37 PM

D.shaferhund Great post. I agree and think that people should be able to get advice without the 3rd degree...at least they are asking for help instead having no knowledge of what they are doing. Then, when you guys give them good advice(cause you always do), they may be more willing to listen when you advise them to spay or neuter.

WingedFoal · 07-12-2005, 10:16 PM

Many times there is hidden advice (that usually comes way too late) in an "attack", like when someone says they think their backyard dog is pregnant, and someone else replies with, "Why wasn't she spayed?" Also, it's mainly people like these that just don't get it. They aren't truly interested in proper care for their dog, and it just gets everyone even more stirred up, because let's face it, most of the people who do the "attacking" are genuine all-out dog lovers and would do just about anything for their dogs. They realize that it is an important responsibility that they have the privilege of taking on, not one that is an entitlement they are due.

I'm glad these people search for help with their questions, but they need to take the advice agreeably, even if it hurts. They asked a question they obviously didn't know the answer to, and they inevitably get an answer. Many times, members try to be tactful with the truth, but are still taken as insults because that isn't what the person wanted to hear.

D.Schäferhund · 07-12-2005, 10:55 PM

Well in my experience preaching and biting heads of doesn't have the effect you might want to get.
Some people just shut down then. i think you have a better chance to get them when you carefully prepare them and then give smaller or bigger hints...

Quote:by Winged Foal
They aren't truly interested in proper care for their dog, and it just gets everyone even more stirred up,Quote end

Well you are right, sometimes you get people who don't care, but do you think they will listen when they get the third degree???I don't think so. Yes some need a wake up call but if somebody runs over me ,i would take my feet in my hands an ruuuuuun, if someone would aproach me nicely i am more willing to listen and take a thought.

Kat

***Cassiepeia*** · 07-12-2005, 11:02 PM

Winged... you're right, sometimes we actually do give them an honest answer to their question. No insults, no attacks, no added questions and they freak out because you didn't tell them how wonderful, safe and responsible you think it is that they've decided to breed their doxie to the peekapoo down the road to make some cash.

Oh well, we've all learned something here at least. Keep our mouths shut until we've answered their question and THEN we can start to ask questions. At least then they can take the answer and ignore everything else.

Cass.

WingedFoal · 07-12-2005, 11:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cassiepeia

Oh well, we've all learned something here at least. Keep our mouths shut until we've answered their question and THEN we can start to ask questions. At least then they can take the answer and ignore everything else.

Cass.

Yeah, seriously.... Because ignore is what they'll do anyway.

JackLover · 07-13-2005, 02:18 AM

How do you know they are going to ignore you? You dont know the person, yes I agree most will ignore the advice, but the problem is people are jumped on before knowing if they are the kind of person who will take the advice or not!

OrionNGaia · 07-13-2005, 08:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JackLover

How do you know they are going to ignore you? You dont know the person, yes I agree most will ignore the advice, but the problem is people are jumped on before knowing if they are the kind of person who will take the advice or not!

I agree - again some of you are "assuming" that people are not willing to listen. Just because an individual does not wish to answer additional questions does not necessarily mean they did not hear the response the the original question. I asked about puppy discharge and was answered with "when are you going to spay"...That was not my question - However, I did receive wonderful responses to my original question.

D.Schäferhund: I AGREE 100% - and about the mixed breed issue too. Look at the Perro de Presa Canario and its history to recreate a dog that was once extinct - talk about a mix

sorry sorry..this is another topic.

Wingedfoal: Taking advice is one thing - taking a direct insult or an attack is another thing.

WingedFoal · 07-13-2005, 09:01 AM

I DID NOT say they should take direct insults. I was meaning that many people give good advice, but it's not what the questioner wants to hear, so they take it as insults, which leads to them getting defensive, which leads to a brawl. I NEVER said someone should take an insult.

Even when members try to give good advice to some of the questioners (before even asking any questions themselves), many people get defensive anyway and think the advice isn't worth taking because that ISN'T what they wanted to hear. But I am not going to tell someone that their poodle mix Fluffy would be a great candidate for more mixed breeding just because Fluffy is in good health and cute as a button. Basically, they have their answer in their head, and wanted someone to justify it, and when nobody does, they get upset.

And just for the record, I am NOT stating that everyone who asks questions is like this. There are many people who we are able to talk to without even the slightest hint of aggression from them, and they take the advice in readily and happily, which makes us give advice more readily and happily. It's mainly because they ARE interested in the best for their dogs.

Flame me if you want, but that's how I see it.

OrionNGaia · 07-13-2005, 09:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WingedFoal

I DID NOT say they should take direct insults. I was meaning that many people give good advice, but it's not what the questioner wants to hear, so they take it as insults, which leads to them getting defensive, which leads to a brawl. I NEVER said someone should take an insult.

Even when members try to give good advice to some of the questioners (before even asking any questions themselves), many people get defensive anyway and think the advice isn't worth taking because that ISN'T what they wanted to hear. But I am not going to tell someone that their poodle mix Fluffy would be a great candidate for more mixed breeding to see what comes out. Basically, they have their answer in their head, and wanted someone to justify it, and when nobody does, they get upset.

And just for the record, I am NOT stating that everyone who asks questions is like this. There are many people who we are able to talk to without even the slightest hint of aggression from them, and they take the advice in readily and happily, which makes us give advice more readily and happily. It's mainly because they ARE interested in the best for their dogs.

Flame me if you want, but that's how I see it.

No, please don't think that

I never said you said that - I was commenting on instances where advice does turn into an 'attack.' That's all. And yes I agree that people do get defensive even when great advice is given - that wasn't the point - but the point that
D.Schäferhund was making.

I'm sorry you would think that you'd be 'flamed'...I think it's great to talk and even debate about things - this is how people learn, vent, understand and work toward a common goal - the love of dogs.

WingedFoal · 07-13-2005, 09:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OrionNGaia

No, please don't think that

I never said you said that - I was commenting on instances where advice does turn into an 'attack.' That's all. And yes I agree that people do get defensive even when great advice is given - that wasn't the point - but the point that
D.Schäferhund was making.

I'm sorry you would think that you'd be 'flamed'...I think it's great to talk and even debate about things - this is how people learn, vent, understand and work toward a common goal - the love of dogs.

Okay, misunderstanding cleared

. It seemed everyone replying to what I said had it all backwards. The whole, "how do you know they won't listen" thing. I don't know, but chances are, you sure can bet by the question if they will or not. But I don't agree with jumping on them first thing. It does happen a lot, though. Oh, and the "flame" comment I made, just for light of the topic.

I think the whole "anwer the question first, then ask your own later" thing sounds good. Flyndog has put her stamp of approval on it, so it is a good thing.

richnrissa · 07-13-2005, 09:58 AM

Well, I just thought I'd say, that it took some foraging around the internet before I found global paw.
I was at many other dog/pet forums.
For your sakes, this is one of the most respectful forums, even during an 'argument' that i've yet to find.
Most of the "welll why aint she done been spayed?" questions have come w/ "i dont want to be rude" comments included or at least until the question is paritally answered
Anything to do with breeding in general is going to inflame opinions.
Anyone coming here for advice on a 1st breeding issue are sometimes so vague in their questions...or its already something 'sticky-ed' to the top, that it beocmes repetetive--making the "flame on' so much easier. Its FRUSTRATING to see so many people out there having pups when you are involved w/ breeding or rescue or what-not.

In another forum, I called the members on it. In a not-so-serious way, because they 'danced' around the issue of what was a good breeder, and who should breed (them only) and who shouldnt (everyone else in creation). and i was VILLIFIED for it. They werent willing to look their own hypocrisy in the face.

That is DEFINITELY NOT the case here.
I agree, care should be taken on the first posters to not scare them away, but dont feel to badly.....because you guys arent that bad.

07-12-2005, 04:35 PM	#16 (permalink)
flyndog Unleash The Possibilities Join Date: Aug 2004 Location: Marfa, TX Posts: 3,969 Rep Power: 183	Well, I can't make "policy", but I can set the tone for guidelines. Those of us here now who are interested can feel free to step in anytime we think another member is being attacked or unjustly flamed by the "Inquisitors" and try to gently and tactfully difuse it. Let me set my official Super Moderator seal to this. Stamp "So it is said, so it shall be done."
	__________________ mARFa Dog Training and Behavior

07-12-2005, 06:47 PM	#18 (permalink)
*Cassiepeia* Chihuahua Mum Super Moderator Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: NSW, Australia Posts: 8,281 Blog Entries: 9 Rep Power: 284	Thanks Kit. D.Schäferhund - I agreed with you all the way up until the 'mutt'/purbreed issue. LOL I'll never play nice with someone who's pro breeding more and more and more mutts. We have enough already, too many dogs (both mutt and "pure" breed) being over bred and put to sleep for me to be nice about that. But you're right, that's another subject entirely. Cass.
	__________________ Say NO! to animals in pet shops. Rescue a friend instead: Petfinder Get more out of Global Paw. Check out these great features. Book Club ~ Blogs ~ Art Classes ~ Woof Review As a member of Global paw staff my opinions are not necessarily those of the website or the owner.

07-12-2005, 09:37 PM	#20 (permalink)
momtobella Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 94 Rep Power: 0	D.shaferhund Great post. I agree and think that people should be able to get advice without the 3rd degree...at least they are asking for help instead having no knowledge of what they are doing. Then, when you guys give them good advice(cause you always do), they may be more willing to listen when you advise them to spay or neuter.
momtobella Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 94 Rep Power: 0

07-12-2005, 10:16 PM	#21 (permalink)
WingedFoal Bostons Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Birmingham, AL, USA Posts: 1,035 Rep Power: 97	Many times there is hidden advice (that usually comes way too late) in an "attack", like when someone says they think their backyard dog is pregnant, and someone else replies with, "Why wasn't she spayed?" Also, it's mainly people like these that just don't get it. They aren't truly interested in proper care for their dog, and it just gets everyone even more stirred up, because let's face it, most of the people who do the "attacking" are genuine all-out dog lovers and would do just about anything for their dogs. They realize that it is an important responsibility that they have the privilege of taking on, not one that is an entitlement they are due. I'm glad these people search for help with their questions, but they need to take the advice agreeably, even if it hurts. They asked a question they obviously didn't know the answer to, and they inevitably get an answer. Many times, members try to be tactful with the truth, but are still taken as insults because that isn't what the person wanted to hear.
	__________________ Last edited by WingedFoal : 07-12-2005 at 11:07 PM.

07-12-2005, 11:02 PM	#23 (permalink)
*Cassiepeia* Chihuahua Mum Super Moderator Join Date: Nov 2004 Location: NSW, Australia Posts: 8,281 Blog Entries: 9 Rep Power: 284	Winged... you're right, sometimes we actually do give them an honest answer to their question. No insults, no attacks, no added questions and they freak out because you didn't tell them how wonderful, safe and responsible you think it is that they've decided to breed their doxie to the peekapoo down the road to make some cash. Oh well, we've all learned something here at least. Keep our mouths shut until we've answered their question and THEN we can start to ask questions. At least then they can take the answer and ignore everything else. Cass.
	__________________ Say NO! to animals in pet shops. Rescue a friend instead: Petfinder Get more out of Global Paw. Check out these great features. Book Club ~ Blogs ~ Art Classes ~ Woof Review As a member of Global paw staff my opinions are not necessarily those of the website or the owner.

07-12-2005, 05:44 PM	#17 (permalink)
D.Schäferhund let's work Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Kansas Posts: 1,798 Blog Entries: 1 Rep Power: 113	hi That is what i had in mind, I was thinking the people come here to get advice, and discuss. i guess most of us people here have a good knowledge and opinions that are nice to share, you never know everything, and it is nice to get other peoples opinions. When i look at me i am a worrier personality, i take a lot of research and still like other peoples opinions. i like it when I get other ways of seeing things to question my own opinions. so the people come here for help for beeing educated... so i believe they have atleast the good will to learn something and to do the best they can to improve... so i rather help them with the topic and then if i suspect something I would ask more questions... but I recently read a post where a person felt urged to lay out all the privat infomation about income to 'defend'(?) himself. i think that's not needed. On the other side purebred, purebred what is purebred today??? most newer Breeds are "mutts", most of the breeds came up in the last 50years out of allready existing purebreds... i had to think of that when I read Labradoodle again... who says when you can make mixed breeds??? Oh ok thats a different topic, sorry got out of my way... so back to subject... I hope it gets more to the point of helping people then giving them the third degree....

07-12-2005, 06:53 PM	#19 (permalink)
D.Schäferhund let's work Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Kansas Posts: 1,798 Blog Entries: 1 Rep Power: 113	Yes I know it is a very complicated subject, it just struck my mind in that context......

07-12-2005, 10:55 PM	#22 (permalink)
D.Schäferhund let's work Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: Kansas Posts: 1,798 Blog Entries: 1 Rep Power: 113	Well in my experience preaching and biting heads of doesn't have the effect you might want to get. Some people just shut down then. i think you have a better chance to get them when you carefully prepare them and then give smaller or bigger hints... Quote:by Winged Foal They aren't truly interested in proper care for their dog, and it just gets everyone even more stirred up,Quote end Well you are right, sometimes you get people who don't care, but do you think they will listen when they get the third degree???I don't think so. Yes some need a wake up call but if somebody runs over me ,i would take my feet in my hands an ruuuuuun, if someone would aproach me nicely i am more willing to listen and take a thought. Kat

07-13-2005, 02:18 AM	#25 (permalink)
JackLover Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: England Posts: 293 Rep Power: 69	How do you know they are going to ignore you? You dont know the person, yes I agree most will ignore the advice, but the problem is people are jumped on before knowing if they are the kind of person who will take the advice or not!
	__________________ "Jack Russell Terriers are like potato chips one is never enough"

07-13-2005, 09:01 AM	#27 (permalink)
WingedFoal Bostons Join Date: Jan 2005 Location: Birmingham, AL, USA Posts: 1,035 Rep Power: 97	I DID NOT say they should take direct insults. I was meaning that many people give good advice, but it's not what the questioner wants to hear, so they take it as insults, which leads to them getting defensive, which leads to a brawl. I NEVER said someone should take an insult. Even when members try to give good advice to some of the questioners (before even asking any questions themselves), many people get defensive anyway and think the advice isn't worth taking because that ISN'T what they wanted to hear. But I am not going to tell someone that their poodle mix Fluffy would be a great candidate for more mixed breeding just because Fluffy is in good health and cute as a button. Basically, they have their answer in their head, and wanted someone to justify it, and when nobody does, they get upset. And just for the record, I am NOT stating that everyone who asks questions is like this. There are many people who we are able to talk to without even the slightest hint of aggression from them, and they take the advice in readily and happily, which makes us give advice more readily and happily. It's mainly because they ARE interested in the best for their dogs. Flame me if you want, but that's how I see it.
	__________________ Last edited by WingedFoal : 07-13-2005 at 09:08 AM.

07-13-2005, 09:58 AM	#30 (permalink)
richnrissa Join Date: Jun 2005 Location: WA Posts: 862 Rep Power: 84	Well, I just thought I'd say, that it took some foraging around the internet before I found global paw. I was at many other dog/pet forums. For your sakes, this is one of the most respectful forums, even during an 'argument' that i've yet to find. Most of the "welll why aint she done been spayed?" questions have come w/ "i dont want to be rude" comments included or at least until the question is paritally answered Anything to do with breeding in general is going to inflame opinions. Anyone coming here for advice on a 1st breeding issue are sometimes so vague in their questions...or its already something 'sticky-ed' to the top, that it beocmes repetetive--making the "flame on' so much easier. Its FRUSTRATING to see so many people out there having pups when you are involved w/ breeding or rescue or what-not. In another forum, I called the members on it. In a not-so-serious way, because they 'danced' around the issue of what was a good breeder, and who should breed (them only) and who shouldnt (everyone else in creation). and i was VILLIFIED for it. They werent willing to look their own hypocrisy in the face. That is DEFINITELY NOT the case here. I agree, care should be taken on the first posters to not scare them away, but dont feel to badly.....because you guys arent that bad.

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